Goodbye goody two-shoes

Yesterday I did everything in my power to kill myself accidentally. It’s fortunate I survived because today is my birthday and I’m now the meaning of life, 42.

I’m a bit of a goody two-shoes but this is only because I don’t like getting into trouble. This makes it doubly painful when I do the wrong thing without meaning to. First I stepped out in front of a car because I thought the pedestrian crossing had changed to green but it was the green light for traffic that had changed. Half-way across the road I wondered why the car 50cm to my right was inching forwards and then I realised he had a green light and I had just walked right out in front of him.

Later I cycled home from the centre of town in the pouring rain. It was dark, rainy and visibility was poor but stupid me forgot to turn the front light on. I have a fantastic, brand new bike, with an expensive, pedal-powered light up front – I turned it on when I first got the bike and I leave it on all the time because there’s no battery – I am the battery and I figure it doesn’t matter if they’re on during the day. But somehow it wasn’t on. I didn’t think to check because I never turned it off. I also didn’t notice it was off because the rain was pouring on my face and there were street lights. Nevertheless it’s hard for cars to see bikes without lights on rainy nights and several cars pulled out in front of me. They did see me eventually but I’m sure they were cursing me – “Stupid cyclist without lights and a helmet”! But I did have a helmet and I did have lights – my helmet is invisible and I simply forgot to turn the lights on.

What really peeved me off about this is that cyclists get such a bad rap as it is. People hate us and without good reason. We just want to do the right thing by our health and the planet – why is that a crime? It’s for this reason that I go out of my way to never do the wrong thing when I’m cycling. I don’t go through red lights and I walk across pedestrian crossings when I’m stopped on the road at an intersection. In short, I do so many things specifically *not* to aggravate the motor brigade – I’m a bloody irritating goody two-shoes. Then I go and cycle home in the dark and rain without lights. I’m sure there’s a new wave of motorists in Aberdeen cursing all cyclists now just because of me. Well fuck that – I’m sick of goody two-shoes. If people hate me for wanting to reduce my greenhouse gas emissions and stay slim then I don’t give a rat’s arse what they think. I’m 42 now and an adult at last, though a slightly dishevelled one.


22 thoughts on “Goodbye goody two-shoes”

  1. Happy Birthday! Though I confess, as a native Californian, traffic lights are meant to be ignored if you are a pedestrian. If I’m standing at an intersection with a WALK/DONT WALK light that says DONT, and there’s no traffic anywhere, I cross the street. Yes, a car could come flying around the corner and I could get hit, but at 61 I could also die of disease like a good many friends have already. Life is seasoned by a little naughtiness.

    1. We can walk across the road here anytime too but the problem was that I had stood waiting to cross and then only started to walk the minute the light went green for the pile of cars who had also been waiting. They must have thought I was an idiot 🙂

  2. Happy birthday. Maybe some of those drivers were also cyclists and thinking Hope that cyclist is ok in the rain, I know how difficult it makes things? One of the nice things about being a cyclist is the feeling of community when meeting or seeing fellow cyclists. Oh and the slim legs thing. It’s amazing. I’ve started doing the two hour cycle to work once or twice a week and I’ve joined a women’s Mtb group.

    1. Yes, you’re absolutely right. I’m just assuming people will think the worst but that may not be the case at all.

      The legs thing is so true! Cycling is great for the legs. Wow – 2hours on the bike to work is impressive. I didn’t realise your work was so far away. Is it mostly on roads or is there a cycle path?

      1. Still hate roads. It’s forty mins to work by car! Fab cycle path along A27 then country lanes then Sustrans route 2 through wood (great fun) then have to go on roads but I am more used to it now. Right at the end some very short stretches where I cycle very slowly along pavement 😦 road junctions too hilly and busy 😦

  3. I should take a photo the next time I get off my bike after cycling home from work, soaked through to my underwear. You are right though – I get SO annoyed with being deliberately ignored on the road.

  4. Ps I forgot to charge my light last time I used it and was touch and go this morning whether I would have to stop at the side of the road to wait for sunrise. What is your pedal powered light like?

    1. It’s fantastic which is why I feel doubly stupid for not realising it was switched off. It’s really bright and obvious when it’s on. The only problem is that if the bike is stationary it doesn’t work which is why turning the switch won’t tell you whether it’s on or off. You need to spin the wheel as well. It’s nice not having to worry about charging the battery.

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